Pinken Stein, known to the dozens of readers of the Humphreydale Gazette as "Aunty Pink" sipped her half-caf-strawberry soy latte and sighed.
"it's not the same."
"Which bit of "not the same" are you talking about?" asked her companion. "I mean the coffee in this world sucks, no argument there. Who flavours coffee with strawberry?"
Pink drank the last of it and grimaced.
"Wellll.... to be honest, Buckeye Dove, your basement is all well and good but it's just not as.... big as the Turbo Cave."
"HEY! I'm sick of you complaining I'm not big enough."
"YOUR BASEMENT!" Pink threw the table at the former fire demon. Buckeye Dove ducked ... straight into it.
"Then there's the total lack of vampires."
"Meh. Those guys were scum even to us demons. ... how they sold you pathetic humans on the whole "tortured romantic sparkly guys" schtick I've never known. But we all used to laugh at you for buying it down at Demon Club."
"wait.... there was a Demon Club?!"
"yeah. We didn't invite you cos of you know you not being a demon...." Buckeye Dove poked his tongue out at her.
"Who else went to Demon Club?"
"The first rule of Demon Club was ghhhghghghghghhhh"
Pink looked at her watch. After 30 seconds she relaxed the hand around Buckeye Dove's throat and dropped him to the ground.
"Bitch." he muttered. "OK OK me, Obsidian X, some of the other guys, about 30 of us altogether... Lucifer used to shove his head round the door and laugh at us sometimes.... Our daughter - "
"She wasn't MY daughter." Pink snapped. Buckeye Dove laughed.
"Sure looked like you...."
"WE. NEVER. DID....."
"Or so you want people to believe..."
"Oh shut up."
"Frightened your boyfriend will start to believe me?"
"Michael's not my boyfriend."
"Sure sure, he just hangs around you all the time like a lost puppy because you got him a gun-cleaning set".
"Fine... the others are due here for the meeting any minute anyway."